Neglect...

Neglect seems to be a theme running through my life right now.  The return-with-a-vengence thyroid symptoms have been snowballing since about 6-8 weeks before I left Australia, and I feel like I'm dealing with a giant fluoride hangover.  As we Hashis (or semi-Hashis, who sometimes test positive and sometimes test negative but still have symptoms - can someone please explain that one to me) know, while one is in the midst of a thyroid disaster, one forgets to do any and all of the positive things that previously had kept us on the rather straight and narrow path that is living successfully with this sucker.  


We forget to do these things because the thyroid fog is so thick we can't see them anymore, and once they cease to be part of our daily mental inventory, they may as well have never existed.  One of the reasons I started this blog was so that if/when I had a major relapse, I could go back to the beginning of it to remind myself just what the bloody hell I'm supposed to be doing about it.  Unfortunately, I have also been neglecting the blog, so I forgot to look.


On top of whatever the hell it was that Australia did to ruin my delicately balanced constitution, there was the fact that I flew to get back to Asia, and the hell out of Oz. I don't fly well. In fact, I'm a true Kiwi, i.e. flying is just bloody unnatural. It takes me months to recover from it, which  I would guess has something to do with adrenal exhaustion due to the continuous, highly stressed state I'm in while flying, even with Valium, which unfortunately, does not  make me fly in any sense of the word.  Bloody useless stuff that it is.  And as if I wasn't already overloaded with triggers for a downwardly spiralling thyroid condition, I was living out of hotel rooms until 4 weeks ago. This meant not being able to cook, which in turn meant I wasn't eating properly. 


At that point, I had completely forgotten about the results of the blood tests done just before leaving OZ; thyroid out of whack (ongoing while in Oz), salts out of whack (really need to pay attention to that one), low on B vitamins (despite taking daily), low on Vit D (despite taking daily), low on iron (despite eating chicken livers regularly).  A final couple of straws: money has been a worry, rather the lack of it. This has led to some frugalities that are counter intuitive to the Hashi, as well as the fact that money worries all by themselves are generally enough to make me miserably ill. And last but by no means least, I have some really suck days at work with some really long hours. Again, completely counter-Hashi. 


This all seems to be leading towards some kind of action plan, or at the least, vague promises to stop neglecting self and do something.  But what?


After some considerable disruption, my sleep is returning to a normal pattern, but it's has once again become the unrefreshing variety. I was having difficulty falling asleep which is really unusual for me given that I can usually fall asleep at the drop of a hat, no matter where I am.  I do sometimes have an awake period during the night when I read or watch TV.   There is a school of thought that now believes this to be entirely natural and in fact, is the human default sleeping pattern: The myth of the eight hour sleep, http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-16964783  and Segmented sleep: Ten strange things people do at night, http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-17193783.  If I start reverting to this again, I'll try to stick with it. Also, I have a sneaking suspicion that the middle of the night waking period would probably be the best time to take thyroid medication. 


Exercise is as usual a collosal blind spot.  I am experiencing a lot of joint pain, which doesn't mean jack as I've tested negative to all arthritic conditions several times.  It just means my thyroid is tricking my brain into replicating the symptoms of diseases that I don't have. Hand in hand with the joint pain is the pain at the site of every broken bone I've ever had...and there are a few.  Just to ice the pain cake, I also have out of control muscle stiffness and pain.  Oh, and I've put on a serious amount of weight in a short period of time. Given that I can't do a hell of a lot of exercise with my bung knee and unrepaired internal injuries, my interest was peaked by this BBC News article: Can three minutes of exercise a week help make you fit? http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-17177251. I think I can try to manage to fit in three minutes a week, and who knows? Maybe, I'm one of the lucky 15%. 


As for diet, it is pretty much under control again - not that it was out of control. I was eating like a normal person, which of course is over eating and eating all the wrong things for a Hashi.  I'm having massive salt cravings, which I indulge, and have completely lost my taste for chocolate. I tried a little the other day and felt immensely better for the rest of the day, but I haven't got the urge to rush out and hunt it down. 


What I really need to do is have some follow up blood tests. Due to the expense of the only decent medical facility in town, I've been putting that off. It's becoming a pressing issue though so  I guess I should aim to be stuck like a pin cushion  next week.  I also need to consider that something is really wrong with the levothyroxine I've been using since I arrived in Australia. Change back to the French version I was on here before. Also, get some bloody pain killers. I was raised to be stoic about pain, so I have a tendency to see pain killers as either unnecessary or the enemy, when in fact, they can be my friend. Pain killers allow me to exercise more, sleep better and enjoy a pain holiday.


Now, how many of these things will I remember to do? I'll try to remember to check back here next week to see how well I did with that.